Mrs. Dad

Do you remember the 1983 comedy movie Mr. Mom?
Well this week, we are living the Mrs. Dad variation.

Lance is on a mission trip to Baja, Mexico.
I was so happy when he felt prompted to go!

But as last week Friday approached, the nerves began to set in for me.
I am taking a week of vacation to be a single stay-at-home mom?
Lance is clearly the stay-at-home hero in this household.
Beyond 3 12-week maternity leaves, I've never been home like this.
With all 3 boys.
In the summer.
"Excel Queen" will have no value in this setting :)

The anticipation on Friday was building.
I was fighting back tears.
Preparing to leave work for a week was overwhelming.
Saying goodbye to Lance is so hard for me.
Nervous about how the week will go
Heart raw for hurting friends.
My head was filling.
And I remembered my mom's wise advice.
"write it down, so you don't have to worry about forgetting"
Because surprisingly, i wanted to remember every one of these "pits" in my gut

I was excited about the opportunity to have 6 hours on the road with my mom & dad
with no little ears tuned in
Avery was gone to baseball tournament for the weekend
Carver traveled with my sister's family
and Davis will watch movies with headphones the entire trip
en route to Fox Lake, Wisconsin
for my cousin's wedding
What a blessing!

The outdoor picnic wedding was wonderful
My favorite part was when my Aunt spoke at the end
She has been blessed with the gift of right words at the right time
and she said
"you are now my daughter-in-law
but i'd prefer to say
you are my daughter-in-love and daughter-in-grace
and no laws can do that"
wow
tears
powerful
that's what i pray for each of my sons
that they rise up as men of God
and are each blessed with a wife
to be my daughters in love and in grace

my mom's family is close
she is #4 in a family of 9 (7 boys, 2 girls)
a huge Christ-centered loving fun family
so many fantastic aunts, uncles, cousins
it's impossible to keep up with all of them,
but delightful to catch up!
and that became a brief possibility while Davis caught a nap

getting him down to nap at my Uncle & Aunt's was a challenge
he had spent most of the day testing boundaries with me
and reminder we are without hero dad!
i'm sitting in the room praying he goes to nap
told him he canNOT get off the bed
so he paces the perimeter of the bed
until SUDDENLY
he spots the large picture hanging on the wall behind the bed
"MARTY!" he exclaims
"MARTY! MARTY! MARTY!"
yep, it was a picture of 3 zebras
[if you've seen the movie Madagascar you're tracking with me]
and then he began to kiss the picture
and i walked out of the room
needing him to fall asleep under the watchful eye of Marty :)
and he did!

saturday night my cousin and friends put on an improv show
laughter is great medicine
all the while Lance was texting me about his repeated flight delays
until he finally arrived in San Diego 7 hours later than planned
and headed to the pier to meet the rest of the group
since then it's been no news good news
we surprised him with a blessed package of cards to open from family and friends

on Sunday morning many were touched
by my mom
as the testimony sharer
in the church her brother pastors
she preached about forgiveness – through the lens of her life story
my grandpa often said to his kids, "you'll live"
in response to bumps and bruises
and those words from her past
became the foundation she could lean on
to stand strong amidst life's trials
and say [sometimes over and over], "I’ll live!"
forgiveness frees the prisoner, and the prisoner is me

upon returning from Wisconsin on Sunday night
the agenda for the upcoming week was slim
Lance left us with an important list for Monday:
1. get the garbage and recycling out
2. pick up dog from being boarded
3. get Carver to swim team practice
4. return Davis' dvds to library

lance and i jointly share nearly all household tasks
except a few that are exclusive
Me = laundry
Lance = dishes, garbage/recycling
so getting the garbage and recycling out early Monday morning
was no ordinary task
and throughout this week i've delegated dishes to Avery
fortunately we've mostly eaten on paper plates :)

Carver loves to play games while Davis naps
Qwirkle is the current favorite

while Carver fished and Avery went to a ballgame Monday night
Davis and i played
a game he made up
throwing a long narrow piece of lego across the living room back and forth
for almost an hour
these are the kind of things that are possible
when there is no set agenda for many consecutive days
then fisherman Carver called that he was ready to be picked up
and he wanted to bring some of his catch home
i said no
for i don't eat it, cook it, or smell it...
but i did look at them before they went back swimming in the pond
and assured him that he could have a fishfry at grandma's sometime

Wednesday i woke thinking - omg it's already Wednesday!
we are at serious risk of not accomplishing my 1 goal for the week
make sure the house looks at least no worse than when dad left
and hopefully actually better
before his return Saturday afternoon
so we kicked it into gear
work before play
we teamed up and worked hard
and then we had a joy-filled afternoon playing at grandma's house
including my sister and her 3 kids
i had had a craving for Dutch Mess
that they were able to help me out with :)
dutch mess - what a special summertime treat
garden lettuce, mashed potatoes, bacon, scrambled eggs - warm, mixed together
A&C both asked for extra helpings!

my brother doesn't like it
considers himself scarred for life for having to repeatedly try it as a kid
and my dad has never caught on either
which reminded me of
one summer day years ago we met at mom’s for a lunch of dutch mess
and dad had some on his plate
and I asked wow have you finally come around?
and he said, not really, but he’ll try some
and we were like NO!
don’t you dare
waste any portion
of this precious batch
on someone who doesn’t fully appreciate its goodness!
:)

and then the kids played in the kiddie pool on the deck
ate snacks
there were no naps
so Davis fell asleep on the couch at 6p
Happy Joe's delivered nacho joe pizza for supper
we watched TV
7p The Voice
8p America’s Got Talent
and THEN
at 9p i rallied the boy trio
and we went to wal-mart
with the sole purpose of purchasing a pool for our deck
but the pool was to wide to fit into our van
so we drove home and got lance's truck
which i hate to drive
especially when it’s got to get backed out of and put back into the garage
all 3 amigos in the back seat
no movie for them to watch
and Avery asks if i know how to drive the truck
!
made it to walmart, loaded the truck with our molded blue kiddie pool
put davis to bed at 9:30p
and excitedly began to setup the pool
the attempted teamwork among me, Avery and Carver was a new experience
which required some tools
aligning screws, washers, nuts for the slide handle/support
and patience
and can-do attitude
especially once we realized it was seriously leaking
after it was filled
and glad dad wasn't there to see the mini flood on the patio below
at which point i rushed the boys down to broom the water away from the house
we finagled the replacement backup plug into the now empty pool
fill again
fail again
it’s 11p, we’re done
and we each ate a left-over cinnamon roll

homemade breakfast each day this week
has been high-carb, high-sugar:
pancakes
cinnamon rolls
french toast
Jaarsma bakery

and now here i sit on my deck
on the hottest day of the year
in pure sweaty bliss
honestly holding back tears
as my heat/sun intolerant special Davis son
is splashing in the pool with his brother Carver
because the plug has been “sealed” with daddy’s magic gorilla glue
yay boys for thinking of and finding that!
our deck is covered and on the east side
so Davis is completely in the shade
i’d personally love to be getting a tan in the sun
but there’s much more joy in watching my boys play!
what an awesome friend Carver is to Davis this afternoon!
and this morning Avery played little tykes basketball
in the basement
with Davis
for well over an hour
So thankful lance got that space finished before he left

Carver is a fish
loving summer swim team practice
burns a lot of calories
and constantly needs to eat
got out of the pool and made his own lunch
sitting out on the deck eating, he announces
“this is probably one of the best sandwiches I have ever had”
Double-smoked ham from Ulrichs + melted Frisian Farms gouda
thanks to our dear friends Jason & Valerie Bandstra at
http://www.frisianfarms.com/
and the remaining 2/3 of his paper plate is a HUGE serving of mushroom rice
surprising there were leftovers of rice available
after he ate 3 heaping servings the other night for supper

i’m covered with large swollen red bug bites
a constant reminder I’m not sitting in an office this week

before Lance arrives in 48 hours
we need to:
bake cookies for church
make fruit salad & strawberry birthday cake
for Carver's birthday overdue birthday party we are hosting on Sunday
we wish sweet corn was on the menu, but it’s going to be late this year

LIVE from the scene of Mrs. Dad,
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